ACHIEVEMENT.

I would like to do something. Something that would make me a recognized fellow.
The other day an officer told me that human beings crave to be recognized. He said he likes being recognized. He does many things for that sake. Even I like it, but I feel my outward nature is to get recognised without saying so.
So from the age of 12, I wanted to achieve something or other and kept on trying!
I wanted to study well. I wanted to sing. I wanted to talk. I wanted to become an Engineer.
My trials were good from 16th year onwards. ( at least from my view point).
Here I have chosen some fields where I made trials - only to realize that I am not at all good at them!
The fields I made trials:

1.Study: Getting tips from here and there and motivating myself from now and then I did my best for study. I wrote on the wall with chalk pieces. The earlier home had half walls with cement where I could write. I crammed passages. I visualised theroems. I made notes with imagination. The successes were only a 20/20 marks in maths during my 5th standard (at that time I never used to study) and a first mark in a class test during my I B.Sc. time.

I was very good at sitting continuously at a stretch for three hours to study something. (better, sitting doing nothing for more hours ha ha). Not at all good enough to get a Rank in a board exam or university exam. Nor could I prove myself and come up in a class competative/Departmental exam

2.Cricket: Brian, Govind and Srinivasa Satagopan were all good at cricket. Brian Saldhana even stole from his home Rs.100/- to buy a cricket set. Sateesh and Venkatesh managed the game well. They played pencil matches.
I did not know what 'hat-trick' means. Govind family were following cricket matches with a map of cricket ground. They knew where the silly point, long on, etc were located.
Venkatesh asked me what 'hat-trick' means. I told him whenever a player excels in a event - that is called hat-trick.
He laughed. He did not tell me so easily what it means. He took a hat trick prank on me. He enjoyed me feeling a grand dullard. If wickets are taken successively three times by a bowler or if a bats man hits three boundaries out of three continuous balls or if three catches are taken consecutively it is called hat trick. I learnt later.
I had an ha trick in not able to get into cricket: 1) Bowling action did not come to me at all. 2) When I batted - I cross batted and broke the bat. 3) A ball hit me in the groin region making a bluish blood clot for one week.
For some time Brian and me enjoyed radio commentary relishing the facts and figures of the game. Later a temporary telecast was made in Bangalore during a test match in late seventies. It was a crude black and white tele cast when compared to the present day sophisticated multi camera telecasts. It was seen by me by paying Rs/2 per day at the National Dairy research Institute. The mentors to see were Venkatesh family.
Now-a-days I watch a cricket match whenever I have plenty of time to kill. At least I have to participate with friends in conversations. Is it not?

3.SWIMMING:My cousins tried to teach me swimming at the 'Manikarni' pond at Vedaraniam. A village at Tamil Nadu. I was aged about 10 then. The temple where the pond was situated was a grand one. My grand mother used to take bath there every morning. I accompanied her. I tried learning holding the steps. No. The skill did not come to me at all.

With another cousin I went to Jayanagar swimming complex at Bangalore when I was in my PUC days. He learnt looking cute with a head gear. I failed.

Again during my B.Sc. times when we went for a NSS camp, my friends tried to put me in a country well, tying a rope to my belly. I could not pick up the floating!

I tried even at 48th year. My son tried to teach me at Hubli swimming pool. He told me to float - whatever was taught to him he taught me. No chance!

I am good at crowbar swimming. I am not destined to enjoy a pool with beautiful females - like James bond! ha. ha. ha.

I am happy - at least I could learn cycling and enjoy a motor bike now - not wasting the efforts of my cousins who made me to learn cycling.

4.Chess: The movements of chess men were taught by my uncle. I thought the learning of moves of chess men on the 64 square board was a great thing. I was very much liking the moves of knight: Jumping two squares and turning right or left one move! And was very proud of it.
I taught the game of chess to a body builder friend of mine. With him I played and won several games. He learnt the game so well that winning him was almost impossible for me on a later stage. (I am great Guru - right?).
We used to sit under the stair way of our Wilson gardens home for several hours deeply engrossed in the game braving my grand mother's shoutings - only me losing the game.
Venkatesh organised some chess meetings on Sundays at Lal Bagh at Bangalore. He and Sreenivasa Satagopan played blind chess without a board or coins. I could only envy them.
Venkatesh also organised a multi playing of chess with a great chess player, Sai Prakash during my college days. Sai Prakash played against 50 players displaying his wonderful concentration. When he came to my board he even pointed out the silly moves I made. Such was his talent/my talent (!)
Venkatesh refused to play with me because I was not to his standards.
Then... at office I tried chess. I taught the game to my son.
Seeing my chess movements one collegue commented: "Is this how you play?!"
I learnt great moves from news papers. Tried to play the grand masters moves. I sincerely learnt the chess notations....the alpha notation and the chessment notations...only to learn that I am not a man for chess!

5.MONEY & SHARES: Read in books that investing money in stocks and shares is a very good activity. Seeing some friends doing that, I thought I could do it with interest. I can take risks and all that. Money was a problem. Though the scripts said the cost of a share is Rs.10/- at par for a share, I had to shell out one or thousands of rupees to get 100 or 200 shares. There were stipulations that a minimum of 100 shares is to be applied. Whether the share will be alloted or not was another question.

Having no extra money and the fear of idling the money till the allotment was my inertia! To over come this tried some mutual funds where the money was invested in shares through groups. The mutual funds I bought did not fetch me as UTI 64 which was paying well during those days.

I thought that I am great book lover and with dreams invested Rs.1000/- in a book company at Chennai. Nothing could be heard from them afterwards except that in the beginning two years the company sent me bulky envelopes containing papers which told me about some board meeting, Audited accounts and all that. In the end, loss of the money was my success proving that I am not a man for hitting the BULL!

Investing some money in another financial corporation unfortunately made the company good awry! Twenty five thousand bucks of mine in that company going to waters did not make me a success in going to other ventures in investing! They say failures are stepping stones for success and these investment steps did not lead me to grand financial success!